Open Funny Thread...
- Thread starter Far West
- Start date
dana
Stunt Driver
This is my fave, so far! Lovin' this thread!
No way that's touching my butt!
FB_IMG_1505135821763
FB_IMG_1505135047184
This sounds like @ShoeDiva
A young blonde woman was driving through the Florida Everglades while on vacation. She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the young Blonde declared, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator and get a pair of shoes for free!"
The shopkeeper said with a sly smile, "Well, little lady, why don't you go on and give it a try?"
The blonde headed off to the swamp, determined to catch an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper was driving home, he spotted the same young woman standing waist deep in the murky water, with a gun in her hand. As he brought his car to a stop, he saw a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning reflexes, the blonde took aim, shot the creature and hauled it up onto the slippery bank.
Nearby were 7 more dead gators, all lying belly up.
The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement. The blonde struggled mightily and managed to flip the gator onto its back. Rolling her eyes heavenward, she screamed in frustration :
"HECK! THIS ONE'S BAREFOOT, TOO!"
A young blonde woman was driving through the Florida Everglades while on vacation. She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the young Blonde declared, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator and get a pair of shoes for free!"
The shopkeeper said with a sly smile, "Well, little lady, why don't you go on and give it a try?"
The blonde headed off to the swamp, determined to catch an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper was driving home, he spotted the same young woman standing waist deep in the murky water, with a gun in her hand. As he brought his car to a stop, he saw a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning reflexes, the blonde took aim, shot the creature and hauled it up onto the slippery bank.
Nearby were 7 more dead gators, all lying belly up.
The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement. The blonde struggled mightily and managed to flip the gator onto its back. Rolling her eyes heavenward, she screamed in frustration :
"HECK! THIS ONE'S BAREFOOT, TOO!"
Far West
Pursuit Driver
Far West
Pursuit Driver
AMEN!
Far West
Pursuit Driver
Far West
Pursuit Driver
This should be saved until May... but is is just too good....
This Man's Mother's Day Gift to His Wife Is Experiencing Simulated Labor
"If I could do it for you I would" is the BS that comes out of every man's mouth in reference to carrying a child and going through labor — but could they really handle what a woman's body can? Penn Holderness admits that he hasn't done the whole Mother's Day thing very well for the last few years, so in 2015 he decided he was going to show his wife how much he loves and appreciates her by experiencing simulated labor pains.
We're sure he has some regrets.
Actually, we're positive.
Throughout the experience, Penn struggles through various pain levels, during which he acts exactly as a woman in labor would — but maybe with his sh*t a little less together. He says to his wife after the experience, "I felt like, mad at you, the whole time. And you weren't doing anything but trying to support me, but you didn't understand what was going on right now. So do you know how it feels to be a husband now and get shouted at?" To which his wife responds with a perfect, "Bring it."
Watch Penn in action and try not to laugh at his expense.
https://www.popsugar.com/moms/Dad-Experiences-Labor-Pains-37420369
This Man's Mother's Day Gift to His Wife Is Experiencing Simulated Labor
"If I could do it for you I would" is the BS that comes out of every man's mouth in reference to carrying a child and going through labor — but could they really handle what a woman's body can? Penn Holderness admits that he hasn't done the whole Mother's Day thing very well for the last few years, so in 2015 he decided he was going to show his wife how much he loves and appreciates her by experiencing simulated labor pains.
We're sure he has some regrets.
Actually, we're positive.
Throughout the experience, Penn struggles through various pain levels, during which he acts exactly as a woman in labor would — but maybe with his sh*t a little less together. He says to his wife after the experience, "I felt like, mad at you, the whole time. And you weren't doing anything but trying to support me, but you didn't understand what was going on right now. So do you know how it feels to be a husband now and get shouted at?" To which his wife responds with a perfect, "Bring it."
Watch Penn in action and try not to laugh at his expense.
https://www.popsugar.com/moms/Dad-Experiences-Labor-Pains-37420369
