heat/no heat in relationships (spinoff of kattie e\'s topic)

mei lan

mei lan

Pursuit Driver
OK, so I have a question. How is your other half when it comes to the temperature inside the home? I know several couples who are polar opposites, and one of the partners WILL NOT GIVE AN INCH when it comes to adjusting the temperature. These dominant personalities (usually the men in the couples I know) insist on setting the temp at 65 when their wife is freezing all the time. I knew a girl who dated a guy for several months, and one of the reasons she broke up with him was that she clued in to his selfishness by this...she would ask him to turn up the temp in the car, and he'd refuse and even turn it colder. My brother is very hot-natured, but SIL is a reptile like moi. I'm happy to say that he leaves their thermostat on 77 all year round because he can live with it, and he knows she's miserable if it's much colder.

To me, this would be a fundamental issue of respect and care for the other person. Your thoughts? How is it in your home/relationship?
 
I've always been fairly hot natured, so I like the house cool. In years past, I would freeze "She who adores me" out.

Then came 40somethings, and now "She who hot flashes" jacks the thermostat down to crazy low temps. Being that I do HVAC fr a living and I have a super system in my house, it will get cold even in the middle of the summer. There were several nights this past summer I woke up cold to fine the house at 65 or so.
 
My other half clearly stated a few weeks ago to not run the heat until outside temps hit the 30's. So I said OK. But who wanted the heat this week and was complaining she was cold?
 
My husband goes around in sweat pants and flannel shirt in summer. He is very accommodating, so when I walk in the family room and the gas fire place has it hotter than blazes in there, I live with it. There's always give and take. :love And he is quite understanding of how nature changes things and that just makes me :love him more.
 
mei lan said:
I knew a girl who dated a guy for several months, and one of the reasons she broke up with him was that she clued in to his selfishness by this...she would ask him to turn up the temp in the car, and he'd refuse and even turn it colder.
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Glad she saw that red flag. That's just mean.
 
Kattie E said:
mei lan said:
I knew a girl who dated a guy for several months, and one of the reasons she broke up with him was that she clued in to his selfishness by this...she would ask him to turn up the temp in the car, and he'd refuse and even turn it colder.
Click to expand...

Glad she saw that red flag. That's just mean.
Click to expand...

I thought so.
 
We are reasonably close. I don't turn the heat up as much as I would really like and he doesn't turn down the air as much as he would like, but typically it's just a few degrees difference. I guess that after 23 years it just works out.
 
We compromise ...

I set a temp ... then she sets a temp ... I set a temp ... then she sets a temp ... then I set a temp ....

I like it cooler in the winter, and warmer in the summer.
 
Fortunately hubster and I are close enough that we don't have an issue.

It would seem to me that if you had two that were really different, it would make sense to keep the house cooler and have the "reptile" wear a sweater or whatever. If you're cold, you can always put more on. If you're hot, there's only so much that you can take off.
 
The hubby and I are polar opposites. BUT, I know how to operate the programmable thermostat and he doesn't so I win... ;D

On the same token, I'm a mizer so I tend to keep the house a cooler in the winter and warmer in the summer. In the summer, the thermostat only dips below 78 when we go to bed and I cool the house off to 74. In the winter, 64 at night and 68 during the day if we're home, and 71 first thing in the morning to "warm up" the house. But, our house is well insulated so it stays comfortable (at least for us).
 
It's no issue with me and Jennifer. We like the same temperatures.
 
I'm the cold natured person in our family. My husband (and both sons) love it really cold. It's not a problem, because I can always add more clothes or cover up under a blanket. In the summer, I dress in sweats and take my snuggie in the car, because I know I'll be freezing!

But my husband does really sweet things for me. If we have a fire going, he'll take a blanket and hold it in front to get it toasty and then put it over me. He also sneaks in the bedroom at night to turn on my mattress warmer so that it's warm when I go to bed. :love
 
Luckily, we cannot afford to have it as cold as hubby would like in the summer, or as hot as I would like in the winter. :dunno

Hubby can't wait for me to get hot flashes... hoping I will keep the house colder.

In the summer, I find myself under a blanket if it goes much below77.

In the winter, I am just miserable. We leave the heater around 68 in the family room area...the rest of the house is closer to 65... I cook a lot and keep a fire going to warm up the kitchen/family room... The fireplace is in the family room.

We have a bunch of wood from my oldest son helping friends cut dead trees down last year. They said he could have the wood if he hauled it away!!!! :cheer1f He gave that to me as a birthday gift- so it's nice and seasoned/dried! Lucky for me he likes to chop wood and use his chain saw!
 
Guard Dad said:
I've always been fairly hot natured, so I like the house cool. In years past, I would freeze "She who adores me" out.

Then came 40somethings, and now "She who hot flashes" jacks the thermostat down to crazy low temps. Being that I do HVAC fr a living and I have a super system in my house, it will get cold even in the middle of the summer. There were several nights this past summer I woke up cold to fine the house at 65 or so.
Click to expand...
Same here. She used to not be able to stand temperatures below 80. Now she is the furnace.
 
:firstplace You are #1 mei lan! I think this is the first time I have been spun off! I'm so proud. :hiya
 
M and I are pretty much the same except for bedtime. He used to sleep with an electric blanket turned on at night, even in the summer. (So glad that thing broke and he's too cheap to buy another one). And he likes the bedroom warm when he sleeps.

I like the room to be cool when I sleep, and several heavy blankets to cover up with.

I usually win if I promise to share my blankie with him. :D
 
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