Here are a few more great lines from Lonesome Dove.
“A man who wouldn't cheat for a poke don't want one bad enough.” (a poke is hanky panky)
“It's not dying I'm talking about, it's living.”
[referring to the Hat Creek Cattle Company sign]
Woodrow Call: ...and if that ain't bad enough you got all them Greek words on there, too.
Gus McCrae: I told you, Woodrow, a long time ago it ain't Greek, it's Latin.
Woodrow Call: Well what does it say in Latin?
[Gus blusters some gibberish]
Woodrow Call: For all you know it invites people to rob us.
Gus McCrae: Well the first man comes along that can read Latin is welcome to rob us, far as I'm concerned. I'd like a chance t' shoot at a educated man once in my life.
“I'm just tryin' to keep everything in balance, Woodrow. You do more work than you got to, so it's my obligation to do less.”
“Well, I'm glad I ain't scared to be lazy.”
Woodrow Call: We come to this place to make money. They wasn't nothin' about fun in the deal.
Gus McCrae: What are you talkin' about? You don't even like money. You like money even less than you like fun, if that's possible.
“Well, hell, boys. I'd damn sight rather be hung by my friends than by a bunch o' damn strangers. Well, adios, boys. Hope you won't hold it against me. Never meant no harm."
Woodrow Call: How do I know you won't start missin' your wife after about five miles and decide to quit?
Po Campo: My wife is in hell; where I sent her.
“A man that will go along with five killin's is taking his leaving awful slow.”
Jake Spoon: A man that will talk to a pig ain't no better than a farmer.
Gus McCrae: I expected you to own a bank or at least a whorehouse by now Jake. It seems life has been a disappointment to both of us.
“Well we don't rent pigs and I figure it's better to say it right out front because a man that does like to rent pigs is... he's hard to stop.”
Gus McCrea: It’s an accident that she is even on this trip.
Clara Allen: I never noticed you having accidents with ugly girls.
And my favorite:
"I'd like to see the herd that you and Jake could gather. Herd o' whores, maybe."